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Sally Murphy, Australian author

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Poetry Friday: The Apostrophiser

July 27, 2018 by Sally

Welcome to Poetry Friday. I’ve had a busy week this week, including a lovely visit to Helena College in Darlington, my first school visit for the term. The year ones and twos were very curious when I told them I was officially Doctor Murphy, and amused when I told them I’m a Doctor of Poetry  (weeeeell, it’s complicated to explain that I’m technically a Doctor of Philosophy, but that my topic was children’s poetry).  The rest of the week I’ve been busy with my university job and also preparing for my upcoming trip to Vietnam.

In all this busyness, I wasn’t quite sure what I would share for Poetry Friday. But, as often happens, a poem idea presented itself to me, this time as I muttered to myself about yet another misplaced apostrophe on a sign I read. As I muttered and grumbled to myself – and wished I could reach the sign to correct it – I realised that there was a poem just waiting to be written. So, instead of defacing the sign, I came home and drafted this little offering. I do feel better now, but can’t vow not to keep apostrophising (or de-apostrophising) when the need arises.

Image from clipart-library.com

The Apostrophiser  

She could never ever stand to see

A misplaced, misused apostrophe.

Hanging somewhere that it shouldn’t

Trying to do that which it couldn’t

 

To see this item thus abused

By a punctuator so confused

Left her feeling rather sad

Or, oftentimes, a little mad

 

Her editing hand would start to itch

An overwhelming symptom which

Would see her reaching for a pen

And correcting errors again and again

 

On pamphlets, posters, leaflets, signs

Apostrophes are everywhere!

Anything with errors in its lines

In menus, notes home, emails, books

Not caring if she garnered looks

 

From embarrassed kids, or passers by

Or angry owners who wondered why

She couldn’t let the errors rest

Instead of fixing them with zest

 

But her red pen was always ready

Her apostrophising hand  ever steady

Ridding the world, one at a time

Of dastardly apostrophe crime.

 

(Copyright Sally Murphy, 2018)

 

Today’s Poetry Friday roundup is at Reading to the Core, where you will find links to lots of other poetry goodness.

Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Poetry Tagged With: apostrophe, photos, poem, poetry, poetry friday, shells

Comments

  1. Molly Hogan says

    July 29, 2018 at 9:58 pm

    Sally, you have so much wonderful stuff going on in your life (CONGRATS!) and still take time to help out apostrophe abusers! 😉 Yay, you! I recently watched a video about a man who wanders around correcting signs and I could totally understand his motivation! Your poem was a delightful way to turn a frustration into humor and creativity. Enjoy your trip to Vietnam!

    • Sally says

      July 30, 2018 at 9:10 am

      Thanks Molly. I could totally join the sign man. It drives me nuts. Thanks for visiting.

  2. Rebecca A Herzog says

    July 29, 2018 at 2:50 am

    Loved the poem! Thank you for sharing.

    • Sally says

      July 30, 2018 at 9:09 am

      You are welcome, rebecca. Thanks for visiting.

  3. Ruth says

    July 28, 2018 at 10:06 pm

    I share your apostrophe angst!

    • Sally says

      July 30, 2018 at 9:09 am

      Maybe we need an apostro-therapy group 🙂

  4. April Halprin Wayland says

    July 28, 2018 at 7:56 am

    OMG, I can relate, Sally! Thanks for my laugh of the day!

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:33 pm

      You are very welcome April. Thanks for dropping by.

  5. Alan Wright says

    July 28, 2018 at 7:22 am

    Loved your choice of topic! It’s easy to identify with ‘The Apostrophiser’ Sally. In time we grow a little closer to the grammar pedants. It’s got something to do with the constant exposure to violations of omission and misplacement. Enjoy Vietnam. Went there last year and spent a most enjoyable month negotiating it’s elongated geography from the northern border to the south. Wonderful people. Delicious food -and such history.

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:33 pm

      Thanks Alan. I am lucky enough to be going for 12 weeks on an Asialink Exchange. I’m hoping to come home with a new verse novel drafted, as well as lots of experiences.

  6. Catherine Flynn says

    July 28, 2018 at 1:46 am

    “Her editing hand would start to itch…” This has happened to me too many times to count! Love your fun poem, Sally! As Mary Lee said, it’s proof that poetry is everywhere!

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:32 pm

      Thanks Catherine. I have been guilty of correcting things ‘accidentally’ – without even thinking about what it is I’m reading or where I am.

  7. Linda Mitchell says

    July 27, 2018 at 11:58 pm

    Oh, this is wonderful! I’m usually the one who’s made the mistake…so I don’t have the itch myself. But, I’m so glad there are some folks that are able to keep my grammar up to par with their red pens 😉 . This is a poem that needs to be submitted somewhere asap.

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:31 pm

      Thanks Linda. It was a fun one to write.

  8. Tara says

    July 27, 2018 at 11:53 pm

    Your poem made me laugh, it’s definitely one to share with students! I love the sound of Doctor of Poetry, and children’s poetry is such a rich topic for a dissertation, too. Enjoy your trip to Vietnam – on my list of places to visit some day.

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:30 pm

      Thanks Tara. I am lucky enough to be going there to write – having been awarded an exchange. It’s still a month off by there’s a lot to do to get organised.

  9. Brenda says

    July 27, 2018 at 11:21 pm

    I bow to you, O Grand Doctor of Poetry, and I imagine you having toiled away on the philosophy of Children’s Poetry, analyzing the colors, repetition and scents of words, properly organized. I love philosophical poetry, as it lets us wonder while we wander.

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:29 pm

      Thanks Brenda. I considered how notions of belonging can be explored in children’s poetry, and also where children’s poetry belongs. Matters very dear to my heart.

  10. Michelle Kogan says

    July 27, 2018 at 9:17 pm

    Doctor of Poetry—How wonderful, congratulations Sally! Your poem is delightful, I love the light hearted rhythm in it’s message (hope that appostraphies correct). Your shell apostrophe is lovely. 😊 Happy travels to you—sounds exciting, thanks for all.

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:28 pm

      Thanks Michelle. My trip is still a month off, but so much to do to get ready – I’m going for three months.

  11. Mary Lee Hahn says

    July 27, 2018 at 6:45 pm

    I’m definitely a kindred spirit when it comes to apostrophising.

    Your poem is proof that we can find ideas for our writing ANYWHERE!!

    • Sally says

      July 28, 2018 at 2:27 pm

      We seek them here
      We seek them there
      We seek those poems
      Anywhere!

  12. Linda Baie says

    July 27, 2018 at 11:23 am

    I’ve seen on the news that there are a couple of people who sneak around with paint bucket & brush to fix those errors you detest so much! Love that you told the kids you’re a Doctor of Poetry, and “dastardly apostrophe crime”. Carry on!

  13. Donna Smith says

    July 27, 2018 at 9:59 am

    I know exactly what you mean! Its so, so frustrating sometimes and bug’s me when they put them IN or LEAVE them OUT… (notice how I cleverly did those??? They were hard to leave that way…) Why is this such a burden?

    • Sally says

      July 27, 2018 at 11:29 am

      Oh so clever Donna. Its hard to deliberately misplace apostrophe’s isn’t it?

  14. Carol Varsalona says

    July 27, 2018 at 9:23 am

    Sally or should I say Doctor of Poetry, as an editor of my literacy association’s newsletter I totally get this stanza:
    From embarrassed kids, or passers by
    Or angry owners who wondered why
    She couldn’t let the errors rest
    Instead of fixing them with zest
    Drop by if you can. I am the 8th stop on Margaret Simon’s Blog tour for her newly published book. I couldn’t fit that in on InLinks
    http://beyondliteracylink.blogspot.com/2018/07/poetic-explorations-of-bayou.html

    • Sally says

      July 27, 2018 at 11:28 am

      I knew lots of my PF friends would empathize with this one. And have just dropped over to see your wonderful post.

      • Carol Varsalona says

        July 27, 2018 at 11:57 am

        Thanks, Sally.

  15. Kimberly M. Hutmacher says

    July 27, 2018 at 9:19 am

    Congratulations on completing your doctorate! How wonderful! And this poem is a perfect example of why you definitely are a doctor of poetry 🙂 Love it! Thanks for sharing.

    • Sally says

      July 27, 2018 at 11:24 am

      Thanks Kimberley, and thanks for dropping by.

  16. Kathryn Apel says

    July 27, 2018 at 9:14 am

    I wondered if we might have seen yesterday’s free-loader beach pic in a poem today. 🙂 Not quite… but close! Fun poem, Dr Sally. Enjoy Vietnam!

    • Sally says

      July 27, 2018 at 11:23 am

      Very close, Kat. The other photo would have been added but for a technology glitch which did not want to transfer the photo from phone to computer. Ah well, I’ll save it.
      Still five weeks till I leave for Hanoi, but with Bookmonth about to hit in full force, I am getting everything ready.

  17. Tabatha says

    July 27, 2018 at 3:14 am

    Doctor of Poetry! Love it. I think most of the people who have a “too many books” problem can also relate to this one! I especially like “To see this item thus abused/By a punctuator so confused/
    Left her feeling rather sad/Or, oftentimes, a little mad.” I don’t know whether “punctuator” is a word, but I like it.

    • Sally says

      July 27, 2018 at 8:06 am

      Thanks for visiting, Tabatha. You got in early! I wondered if it was word too but, funnily, spell check decided it was fine. And we all know we can trust spell check, lol.

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