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Sally Murphy, Australian author

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Poetry Friday: This is Just to Say

February 3, 2017 by Sally

Earlier this week, I posted about mentor text, and how can use them to inspire new poems of your own. Today, I wanted to share another effort. This one is based on what I suspect might be the most-used mentor-text poem ever, and a poem which changed my world.

First, the poem, by William Carlos Williams, which I hope you’ve come across before:

This is Just to Say

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox    (read the rest of this copyright poem here)
This poem, written as a note of apology, was one of the first free verse poems I remember reading. It was my first year of high school, and our teacher gave us the poem to read, discuss and, yes, mimic in poems of our own. I remember being amazed that poems could be written that way. Years later, when I wrote my first verse novel, Pearl Verses the World, I gave that experience to Pearl:
Pearl Verses the World
One day Granny read me
A poem
About a man stealing a plum
Granny, I remember saying
Why are there no rhymes
In that poem?
Granny laughed.
Why, Pearl, didn’t you know
A poem does not have to rhyme?…
A poem, comes
When it is needed
And writes itself
In the way it needs
To get its point across.
(from Pearl Verses the World,  2009, p. 63 Copyright Sally Murphy)

 

Anyway, back to the use of a mentor text. Williams’ This is Just to Say ahs been used in classrooms and by writers as a mentor text many many times.  There have even been books written based on the poem, my favourite of which is Joyce Sidman’s This is Just to Say: Poems of  Apology and Forgiveness.

Here is my own attempt a ‘This is Just to Say’ poem. I stuck with  the food  theme, and also gave an extra nod to Williams’ poem with my mention of plums.

This is just to say

I have eaten

the cake

that was in

the pantry

 

and which

you were probably

saving

for visitors.

 

Forgive me.

We had

no peaches

and no icy plums.

 

(Copyright Sally Murphy, 2015)

 

Have you ever written a This is Just to Say Poem? Or do you have your own favourite mentor text? I’d love to hear about it.

This post is part of Poetry Friday, where bloggers around the world post about poetry every Friday. Later today, you’ll see a round up of all the Poetry Friday posts at Penny’s blog.

Filed Under: My Books, Poetry Tagged With: mentor texts, poems, poetry. poetry friday, this is just to say, william carlos williams

Comments

  1. Margaret Simon says

    February 8, 2017 at 8:26 am

    This is just to say

    I am late
    to the party
    of poems
    with no rhymes

    I was twirling
    around other
    posts.
    I should
    have come here first.
    Now I know.

    Forgive me
    for leaving
    so early
    and forgetting
    to say
    goodbye.

    Margaret Simon with a nod to Catherine Flynn for sending me here through Laura Shovan’s Facebook poetry challenge.

    • Sally says

      February 8, 2017 at 12:06 pm

      This is just to say
      I’m glad you came late
      and kept the party going
      Your poem
      was so perfect
      just like that plum.

  2. Mary Lee Hahn says

    February 5, 2017 at 10:41 pm

    Don’t you love it when the comments get as (or more!) interesting than your post? This is not to say that your post was uninteresting or anything less than juicy…

    🙂

    • Sally says

      February 6, 2017 at 9:23 am

      lol, I hear you Mary Lee. And yes, I do love it.

  3. Ruth says

    February 5, 2017 at 9:34 pm

    Great post and great comments!

    • Sally says

      February 6, 2017 at 9:21 am

      Thanks Ruth.

  4. Linda Mitchell says

    February 4, 2017 at 8:51 am

    Oh, my goodness….the comment string is as fun as the post! Wonderful post, Sally. I remember when I first discovered novels in verse and I felt like the only one in the world that had figured out just how wonderful they were (yah. no publisher, author. Just me wrapped up in a cloud of wow). My first and continued response is….I want do DO THAT!

    This is Just to Say

    I have read
    the book
    you left
    by your chair.

    and which
    you were probably
    going to read
    after supper.

    Forgive me
    it was suspenseful
    a real page turner
    til the dog died.

    • Sally says

      February 5, 2017 at 11:25 am

      Love it, Linda. I felt the same way when I discovered verse novels.
      I love the twist at the end of yours – though of course it’s sad.

  5. Kiesha Shepard says

    February 4, 2017 at 7:50 am

    Sally, I love your poem! And my fourth grade son, who is joining me on this Poetry Friday, says, “Great job!” as well. My favorite mentor text at this time is Mary Oliver’s “New and Selected Poems.” I agree that mentor texts can help inspire and grow us as writers.

  6. Doraine says

    February 4, 2017 at 7:43 am

    Such a fun post! Cake sounds so much better to me than icy plums! You’re forgiven.

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:14 am

      Thanks Doraine. Yes I prefer cake, too, though plums are healthier.

  7. KatApel says

    February 4, 2017 at 7:01 am

    This is Just to Say

    I have eaten
    the minutes
    that were in
    the present

    and which
    you were probably
    saving
    for today.

    They slipped
    through my fingers
    so sweaty
    and so hot.

    Thanks for the prompt to play, Sally. x

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:14 am

      Thanks Kat. I was wondering where time was flying to. Clever response.

  8. Laura Shovan says

    February 4, 2017 at 2:35 am

    I love your take on this poem. Don’t have time to play today, but you must check out actor Matthew Macfadyen’s reading of this poem on youtube. SWOON. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0d5bLf0gq2Q

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:13 am

      Oh swoon indeed. Thanks for the link.

  9. Jane @ Raincity Librarian says

    February 4, 2017 at 2:34 am

    I remember having a similar epiphany in school when I discovered free verse – it was like a whole new world of poetry opened up!

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:10 am

      Yes, Jane. Much as I love rhyme, it can be very difficult to master and very constraining for young writers.

  10. Robyn Hood Black says

    February 4, 2017 at 2:31 am

    Deep bows and hats off to you, Brenda, Donna, and Joy – what fun!
    (Love those “icy plums” as the last two words in your poem!)
    Just sayin’.

    • Robyn Hood Black says

      February 4, 2017 at 2:32 am

      PS – Extra points to Joy for those white chickens! ;0)

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:09 am

      Thanks Robyn. I’m thrilled to have so many poetic responses to my post.

  11. Joy Acey says

    February 4, 2017 at 2:00 am

    This is just to say
    I have taken
    the surfboard
    leaning against
    the shed.
    the beach was
    too inviting
    the white chickens
    didn’t even
    crow.

    • Carol Varsalona says

      February 4, 2017 at 4:41 am

      And now from Hawaii and the beach, Joy created a poem too.

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:08 am

      Oh Joy. How clever to bring in the white chickens. Perhaps there was a red wheelbarrow in that shed?

    • Linda Mitchell says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:44 am

      bwa ha ha……I’m sitting under two blankets with a cuppa hot tea. The beach sounds like heaven!

  12. jama says

    February 4, 2017 at 1:45 am

    Nice to read the poem from your book, and of course I love your cake poem. 🙂

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:07 am

      Thanks Jama.

  13. Tara says

    February 4, 2017 at 12:33 am

    Ha! Was it a plum cake, perchance?

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:06 am

      Oh of course it was a plum cake. Why didn’t I think of that?

  14. Penny Parker Klostermann says

    February 3, 2017 at 11:42 pm

    Thanks for the mentor text and for sharing your poem. Fun exercise…I’ll have to try it sometime 😀

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:06 am

      Thanks Penny, and thanks for posting the roundup.

  15. Kay McGriff says

    February 3, 2017 at 10:07 pm

    No, I haven’t written one yet but it’s on my list of poems to try! I loved Sidman’s book, too.

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:06 am

      Thanks Kay. Sidman’s book is very clever, isn’t it?

  16. Linda Baie says

    February 3, 2017 at 10:01 pm

    My 2nd-grade granddaughter’s class just wrote to this poem earlier in the year, Sally. She was very excited about it. I like that you gave your own nod to the plums. William Carlos Williams would be grateful.

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:05 am

      Thanks Linda. I love that it’s still being used in classrooms.

  17. Donna Smith says

    February 3, 2017 at 8:16 pm

    This is just to say
    I have beaten
    a poem
    to death

    I tried to
    rhyme it
    and sweeten it
    for readers

    Forgive me
    I should have
    let it
    breathe.

    Thanks for the mentor text today!

    • Carol Varsalona says

      February 4, 2017 at 4:41 am

      Another one from Donna. I am enjoying your post, Sally.

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:05 am

      How violent, Donna. Thanks for the laugh.

    • Margaret Simon says

      February 8, 2017 at 8:21 am

      OMG! Here’s another one. Dare I play this game?

  18. brenda says

    February 3, 2017 at 7:38 pm

    This is just to say
    I ate the comment
    that was here.
    It was well-rounded,
    thoughtful,
    insightful.
    Forgive me.
    But it was so sweet,
    straight from the dicy box.

    • Joy Acey says

      February 4, 2017 at 1:56 am

      Brilliant Brenda
      eats everything
      partial to poetry.

      • Sally says

        February 4, 2017 at 8:08 am

        Clever Joy
        replies
        apologetically
        to Brenda’s poetic
        munchies.

    • Carol Varsalona says

      February 4, 2017 at 4:40 am

      Sally and Brenda are on a roll. Wonderful exchange. I will have to try this poem format in the future.

      • Sally says

        February 4, 2017 at 8:13 am

        Thanks Carol. It’s turned into a fun post indeed.

    • Sally says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:04 am

      Oh Brneda. How clever! Thanks for the giggle.

    • Linda Mitchell says

      February 4, 2017 at 8:42 am

      ha! that’s beautiful!

    • Margaret Simon says

      February 8, 2017 at 8:21 am

      Brenda, Love your response poem! Ha!

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