We sing of jingle bells and snow
Of warm red suits and ho ho ho
But none of this is quite the way
When it is Christmas here below.

Downunder in good old Aussieland
It’s time for sun and surf and sand.
It’s hot, not cold, it’s summertime
And summer treats are in demand.

Hard work for reindeer in this heat
Hot roofs would burn their tender feet
And racing through the summer skies
Would leave the poor things feeling beat.

And as for Santa in fur and such
He’d soon feel overdressed a touch.
Being snug and warm in blistering heat
Is not likely to impress him much.

Santa needs roos for the job
Of sleigh-pulling – an Aussie mob
To get him moving all around
From Sydney town to Iron Knob.

His suit, too, needs an overthrow
A new outfit, from head to toe.
Some boardies, a singlet and some thongs
Would seem to be the way to go.

So let’s not sing of snow and ice
Instead I’ll give you this advice
Roos, utes and summer are the go
For Christmas songs that sound real nice.

So ripper, bonza, beudy, strewth
Though you might think my song uncouth
It’s true blue and its ridgy didge
To sing a song that tells the truth.

(Copyright Sally Murphy, 2014)